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Anal Sex, Anal Fisting, Extreme Anal Fisting Lesson #1

Tip #1: Play Safe

Anal sex can be safe, but you need to take precautions.

Rule number one: Anything that touches the anus shouldn’t be touching anything else. Never ever take the penis out of the anus and put it into the vagina. That can lead to serious infections and other complications. After any kind of anal play, you should immediately change condoms and wash the relevant body parts thoroughly.

You also need to worry about sexually transmitted diseases. AIDS; herpes, genital warts, syphilis, and gonorrhea can all be transmitted through anal sex. You simply shouldn’t be having anal sex without a condom; it’s not worth the risk to either partner.

Tip #2: Lube, lube, lube

The vagina produces it’s own lubricant. The anus does not. Therefore, you need to supply the lube, one way or another. On top of that, using a lot of lube is good and using even more lube is better. It makes the whole experience much more pleasant, for both partners. This is the number one mistake people make in having anal sex: not enough lube.

All kinds of lube are used for anal sex, from spit to Vaseline to high-tech silicone-based lubes. We’d strongly recommend spending a little money to get a high quality water-based lubricant; remember, an oil-based lubricant like Vaseline will degrade the latex in a condom, destroying its usefulness. We’d recommend products like AstroGlide or KY Jelly, available in any drug store. Note, though a condom may be “lubricated”, they typically don’t offer as much lube as we’d recommend for anal sex.

We don’t recommend specialty lubes designed for anal sex that include an anesthetic to numb the woman’s sensation. Anal sex isn’t supposed to be painful. If it’s painful, you need to figure out what’s wrong, not mask the pain with a topical anesthetic.

Tip #3: Work your way up

Start with your fingers. Try one, see how your partner reacts, then add another. Initiate your partner slowly into the joys of anal pleasure. Try it while performing oral sex for an extra thrill. Be sure not to forget the lube, and you might also want to wear latex gloves.

As your partner gets used to your fingers, you might graduate to a butt plug or a small dildo. Dildos are available in all shapes and sizes. Go shopping together to get one she thinks she can handle. Remember, though, don’t put the dildo into the vagina after putting it into the anus. The safest way is to put a condom on the dildo before using it, and to wash it thoroughly immediately after.

Tip #4: Turnabout is Fair Play

Whether you’re trying to convince someone to have anal sex or trying to figure out how to do it in a gentle, pain free manner, there’s no better preparation that exploring anal play with yourself.

A partner is much more likely to consent to anal sex if she’s seen that you’re open to being on the receiving end as well. Encourage her to use her fingers inside of you, or even purchase a butt plug or small dildo and let her use that. Once she’s seen you’re willing to do it, it’ll be hard for her to resist exploring it as well.

Of course, anal play on yourself is a great way to learn how anal sex feels and to learn how to make it more comfortable for your partner. You might also be surprised just how much you like it…

Tip #5: Clear the Way

Before having anal sex, you should evacuate the premises. If you don’t, it can be messy and unpleasant for all. A normal bowel movement should be good enough, but some people also opt for an enema.
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Fisting Lesson #1:

Fisting Made Easy

Yes, you can get your whole hand inside your partner’s pussy. For women who are into massive penetration, nothing is a bigger turn-on. No experience is necessary—for either of you—but if your gal pal is a little “roomy” or has given birth in the past, you’ll have an easier time. Otherwise, you may need to start off slow and work your way up.

A few words of caution before you roll up your sleeves and plunge in: fisting can result in injury to the fistee if not done properly. Trust and communication between partners is essential–and tons of lube help a lot, too. Respect your partner’s limits and pain threshold. The following guide is intended for consenting adult partners who wish to engage in this act, and we assume no responsibility for possible injuries caused by or to those attempting it. That said, let these tips be your guide to safe and sane fisting.

1. Get her ready.

Make sure your partner is relaxed, turned on, and comfortable. When a woman becomes aroused, her vagina relaxes, expands, and lengthens—all very important for accommodating a fist. Also, make sure your hand is very clean and your nails closely trimmed.

2. Use lube.

Even the wettest snatch can use some extra juice during fisting—the more, the better. Two lubes I recommend are Astroglide and Liquid Silk. A latex glove can also reduce friction and is a good idea for safer sex purposes.

3. Start slow.

Start with one or two fingers and work your way up to three and then four. Most women need some time to further relax the muscles of their vagina, and some may require several “stretching” sessions, over weeks or even months, before you can actually get your whole hand in.

4. Duck inside.

As you add more fingers to your partner’s cunt, squeeze them together so your index and pinkie fingers are under your middle and ring fingers. As you push further inside, tuck your thumb under your fingers. (Imagine you’re making shadow puppets and trying to do a duck.) This makes your hand into a wedge shape that allows you to gradually stretch her open as you press on. Apply steady but slow pressure.

5. Let her lead.

Listen to your partner and let her tell you when to push, when to back off, when to add more fingers, and when it’s too much. Fisting can cause vaginal muscle and tissue injuries if you go too fast or too hard. Some pain during fisting is normal, but you have to take her word on the difference between a “good” hurt and a “bad” hurt.

6. All the way in.

The knuckles are the widest part of the hand and the most difficult part to get past the opening of the vagina. You’ll probably run into resistance at that point. Wait until your partner is ready before making the big push. She may be able to help by “bearing down” as if giving birth. Once your knuckles slip past the ring of muscles around the vaginal entrance, you’ll find your whole hand enveloped in warm, wet pussy. Now roll your hand into a fist.

7. Voila!

At this point, your partner may or may not want you to make gentle fucking movements with your hand inside her, or stimulate her clit. Fisting produces extremely intense sensations for women, so ask her what feels good. When you’re done, make your hand into the “wedge” shape again, and gently slide out.